Some things are consistent in our program year after year. We know, for example, that every year some players will challenge us, as coaches and challenge our culture. In almost all cases it’s a player new to our program. These challenges to the coaches and our culture take many forms. On occasion a player will challenge a coach directly, refusing to participate in a drill or activity, talking back or challenging a coach’s knowledge. There have been rare times when a player spoke disrespectfully to a coach with personal, derogatory comments. Sometimes it’s more subtle - isolating a peer, looking down on a player who is perceived to be less skilled, or making hurtful comments – just loud enough for a few other players to hear it. It can also be as simple as carrying on a personal conversation when someone else is speaking to the group. All of these examples bring us to the issue of respect.

To be clear we have a great group of kids –always have – and these incidents are isolated. Some of it is not unusual. We know, however, if we don’t attend to the incidents it can, and will get contagious. We’ll do what we need to do to support the culture we’ve been building over 7 years. We did our battles early on in the programs infancy – and we’re not going back there.

For some of you reading this you may be surprised – maybe not. But it does happen and for the most part we are OK with it – to a point. Our program aspires to be about basketball skill development and personal (team) development. Both are learning processes. We expect to introduce our culture and the expectations that come with it and we expect some pushback.

Expecting it, we try hard to avoid getting organized by any disrespectful behavior. We assess, understanding that there are lots of possible reasons for it. Sometimes it’s a reflection of anxiety, a new player in a new social environment. Sometime it’s familiarity – a player thinking they know the coach well enough to make comments. Other times it’s a player looking to find out where the boundaries are - - how far can I go? Kids are very aware of their surroundings. In our environment that could mean noticing that maybe your skills are not to the level of some of those around you. There could be younger players with more advanced skills than an older player. This can be difficult for a player to handle. When we add correction it can be hard to save face. To save face a player might make a comment.

Understanding that the development of basketball skills takes time we opted to open the program up to a wide age / grade range. This creates some challenges – teaching age appropriate skills training, accommodating a wide range of maturity levels, dealing with the typical hierarchy that evolves from one age group to another. When we bring together kids from multiple school districts the comfort of their peer group is threatened – an additional stressor.

Our kids come to our program for a number of reasons – most for basketball, some needing attention, and some just to be with their friends. If you’re not there for basketball there may be a conflict that plays out in the workshops.

These challenges are also opportunities. It’s another example of how athletic competition presents real life scenarios for negotiation. Dealing with direction, a new social order, failure to perform to your own standards, saving face, managing anxiety, investing beyond your level of comfort to get what you want – it’s all stuff a kid will have to deal with at one time or another. When these kids get to Voorhees they will all be together. Hopefully many of them will play for the Lady Vikes. So if there are struggles with these issues now they will be in a better place later.

So if there is an issue with respect we’ll take a step back and assess. If we think the issue is related to some type of anxiety we’ll take a supportive approach. If the behavior gets to be out of bounds we’ll make sure we set limits on the behavior and that the player knows the boundaries. The good news is we rarely have to return to the discussion with a player. Usually simply speaking to the concern takes care of it.

In all of these relationships – coaches to players, players to players –it is about respect. It’s not realistic to expect everyone to like everyone else. We don’t all need to be snap chat buddies. A respectful culture starts with self-respect and extends to respect for others – teammates, coaches, opponents, and officials.

Our expectations about respect are fairly simple:

Ø Have respect for yourself, your potential and your abilities

Ø Be respectful of others – opponents, officials, teammates, coaches…..

Ø Be attentive and listen when others are speaking

Ø Be supportive of all players regardless of their level of skill

Ø Give the coaches your full attention

Ø Leave the gossip and put downs at the door

Ø Do your best to speak to any concerns that you have

Ø If you see someone being disrespected speak up

For the high school players there are also expectations of respect during games. 

Ø Bring your full focus and attention to the game. Your teammates are relying on you.

Ø No player is to argue with an official. If there is a case that needs to be made the coach will speak with the official.

Ø Play hard and with intensity but focus your intensity on the execution of skills and team play.

Ø Basketball is a physical game. If we knock a player down we offer to help her up. We can play hard and with intensity but also display sportsmanship.

Ø Never give up. If you make a mistake (and everybody does) play on. When you hang your head and stop hustling after a turnover or missed shot you’re showing a lack of respect for yourself, your teammates and the game of basketball itself.

Ø The coaches for the game are the coaches on the bench with you. You cannot be effective if you also have a “coach” in the stands. If you are interacting with the coach in the stands during a game we’ll ask you to move to the bench in the stands for the remainder of the game.

Again – we have great kids in the program – all of them. We have a large number of new players in the program this year and every year. We think it’s important to communicate our approach so that we’re all on the same page. If you hear something that concerns you please let us know.

Thanks to Caroline and Jenna for helping out. Though injured they show up every night and do a great job helping coach the middles school players. That’s commitment. Thanks also to Allie Best and Jess Katzenberger for stopping in and helping out. Allie, a 1,000 point scorer, All State player and arguably the best player to come out of Voorhees now plays for Marist. Jess, yes, the same Jess Katzenberger of the Jess Katzenberger Spin Move, still holds the record for most workshops attended with 138. Jess attends Lebanon Valley where she is a member of the track team and excels at the javelin throw. Both are great role models, part of our original group, and a big part of the One Voice / Voorhees tradition.

Bob Peterman