“Over the course of a lifetime the only lasting failure is the failure to try”.

Dr. Bob Rotella, author of How Champions Think

If you ever participated in challenge course activities, you know that the end of a well facilitated sequence usually involves some type of peak experience. Lots of times it is a high ropes course activity. The participant is asked to climb a ladder to a tree and then attempt the activity element. Typically this is an activity set 30 - 45 feet off the ground. This is not a coincidence. The obstacles that are constructed at height are designed to hit on one of two buttons common to most people. The activity will put participants in touch with any fear of heights they may have. The activity will put the participant in a vulnerable position – risking a loss of control and / or looking clumsy or incompetent. For most it’s the fear of heights. As an example, a high ropes course activity called the Pamper Pole challenges a participant to climb a tree to a height of about 40 feet and step out onto a small platform. A trapeze or a vertical bar hangs six to eight feet out in front of the climber. The climber can choose to jump out and try to catch the trapeze – or not. The climber wears a harness and is connected and protected by a rope that is held by a qualified “belayer”. This often does little to calm the climber as he or she considers addressing the challenge. It’s not uncommon for a climber to enthusiastically start to climb the tree and then, about 15 – 20 feet from the ground, freeze.

This is the part where our subconscious mind kicks in, promoting fear, reminding you of all the things that can go wrong and encouraging you to play it safe, opt out, stop climbing and get back down in a hurry. This is where perceived limits can dominate our thinking. We can get stuck here, literally and figuratively. Some people give up and stop trying. Skilled facilitators know that success on this activity and others like it, is not about catching the trapeze. Success is about changing that point where you originally get stuck. It’s about getting past that point where you are saying to yourself. “I can’t do this”. Because the truth is you can do it. You may not want to do it but you are capable of doing it. Success is taking one more step up the tree when you think you can’t. Or success may be just stepping on the first rung of the ladder – just one foot off the ground – when you are too scared to try at all. Or success could be letting go of the tree and jumping for the trapeze – literally letting go of your fears and stepping out and away from your comfort zone. Success is changing your perceived ceiling – the limits you set on yourself – by taking action, even small steps, pushing the limits back just a little bit. It’s never giving up on yourself.

This is familiar territory for many of us. It happens and can happen often. It’s the fight or flight response mechanism in play. In the real life scenarios it is easy to retreat and hide – remain comfortable. We know the “hiding places” available to us. Those places where there is no stress, no threats to our ego – cruise control living. The problem with hanging out here is that by staying safe and comfortable we often deprive ourselves of the opportunity to glimpse our true potential. We miss out on the chance to experience the rush that comes from expanding the boundaries of our perceived abilities, overcoming our doubts and fears and adding another positive layer to our self-image. Those benefits compound regularly. The feeling of successfully addressing a challenge enhances our self-image and builds our confidence which gives us the confidence to handle the next challenge, which can lead to more success.

Not giving up can become a habit. It’s been said that Voorhees players never give up. Historically that’s true. Lady Vikes teams have always played hard, right to the final buzzer. There have been years when we lacked talent but never effort. There are times however, when despite playing hard until the end, a player or a team can still be seen as giving up. One way of “giving up” is to come out and play safe – not take risks, not try new things, or work on new skills – remaining average, hiding safely in status quo mode. When you don’t play to your potential, don’t use your talent or don’t play for your teammates you’re giving up. Not giving up means more than just continuing to try hard – it means actively and purposefully trying to be better – willing to risk failure in an effort to be better. It means, not only playing hard until the clock runs out, but insisting on getting the most out of every minute – before, during and after the game. We can give up on ourselves when we settle for average or good enough.

The players who set themselves apart from others are those who realize that the competition is not necessarily the opponent. The real competition happens within – you are competing with you. You are challenging your doubts, your fears of failing and your concerns about what others may think. You are challenging the little voice in your head that says, “What’s the point of trying, this game is over. We can’t win.” Or “She’s so good, I can’t compete with her.” Changing that mindset is not easy. It can be tough to take that first step, to put yourself out there. But, just as in the Pamper Pole activity, building a positive mindset can begin with just one step. You can say "I can" rather than "I can’t". You can let go of the tree and give your best effort, going for the trapeze. Maybe you’ll grab it. Maybe you’ll miss it. At some point you’ll realize that success isn’t about grabbing the trapeze. Success is about “the try” – your best try - pushing through the resistance, taking the chance, not holding back and letting your talent show.

High school players - You have a lot of games ahead of you this summer. We talked a lot about bringing the skills you show in drills and workouts to the games. Those games are part of your preparation for your high school season. While winning is always nice it’s more important to make use of the experience, get better every day and push yourself and your teammates forward, one step at a time. Take the first step, work your way up to the platform and give the leap for the trapeze your best shot. These are the things you can control – risk putting yourself out there, let your talent show, support each other, pick up those who are struggling with their performance or their attitude, look for signs of improvement and don’t accept “I can’t” from anybody. We won’t accept it and if we see something that needs to be addressed we will speak to it. If the feedback makes you uncomfortable step back and consider the alternative – we can’t say we care about what happens with you and your teammates if we don’t care enough to give you the feedback you need to improve.

Middle School players- Trust us, you will not be the same player when the fall season arrives. The question is will you be a better players because you continued to work on your game; or will you slide backwards because you didn’t put the time in during your summer break. You have all come too far to let it go. Keep getting your reps in. You can find the basics of any skill we teach under the Drills section. If you need help let us know.

Jess Katzenberger, Kelly Reilly, Dana Croghan, Allie Best and Caitlin Reilly at Thursday’s final workout. Emma Jones (not pictured) was also there. It was nice to have some of the alumni back on Thursday, giving back, like they always do. We had captains from 2013, 2015, 2016 and 2017 at the gym. Kelly Reilly captain of the 2013 team was there. Kelly was one of the original players in our program. Often she was the only player to show up for the workouts. Her perseverance helped the program turn the corner when there wasn’t much talent or commitment. Emma Jones, captain of the 2015 team came to play. Emma was on the team that went to the state sectional final in 2015. Dana Croghan, captain of the 2016 team that won the conference, tri-county and State Sectional championship was there. Caitlin Reilly and Allie Best, captains of the 2017 team were back again. Cait and Allie played on three consecutive teams that went to the state sectional final. Caitlin is playing at Marywood University and Allie, and All State player, is playing at Marist. Jess Katzenberger, the all-time One Voice attendance leader and member the 2016 team that won the conference, tri-county and State Sectional championship was also there. Thanks to Caroline Kenzari and Jenna Baranek for all their help this spring. Neither Caroline nor Jenna was able to play due to injury but they showed up almost every night to help out. With the numbers we had this spring –an average of 30 players per night – we couldn’t have done it without them. And finally, thanks to Sean Reilly and Dan O’Sullivan who volunteer their time to make this all work.

Bob Peterman